Random bits of Cruft
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Can i keep it Mum.. Please… This thing is freaky.
Fox News Report
This is hilarious. The news reporters can’t even control their laughter!
CNN Report
Slight variation from the first. So funny how he thinks that he’s dead!
Full Length 911 Phone Call
Here’s the full un-(news)cut version.
This guy is like a cross between the professor on Back to the Future and Kramer. But very high on heavily mind altering substances. 
Update: This would be a perfect halloween costume, sure to scare off any trick or treaters. May need a disclaimer on the door in case parents call up later complaining of distressed children. 
Hopefully most of the CruftBucket viewers chose the left side.
If not, here are a few jokes that should straighten you out.
Since Britney Spears has shaved her head ‘for the environment’, there’s a new Chia that you must get if you want to keep up with Britney’s latest hairstyle. Now you can start from scratch just like Britney!
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